Thursday, October 14, 2004

Helpful Dog


Not all animals are as obstinate as a donkey. Some have genuine empathy and would gladly like to help in any way possible. Take dogs for instance.

According to the legend our great grandfather had a jalopy that could barely make it from here to there. Most days it needed a bit of tweaking and a lot of muscle power to crank the rattletrap into life.

Now, the old man was not known for his patience, so the car often tested him sorely. Many times he had threatened to set the S.O.B. on fire, but with no money to replace it, no one took him seriously.

This particular day, the family had to attend a funeral and everyone was dressed up in black for the occasion. Great-grandpa took off his jacket and draped it over the hood of the car, and then proceeded with the customary starting ritual. It was a nice hot day, and that gave him hope that the car would fire up a little easier.

Alas, that was not the way it turned out. After about 20 minutes of priming interspaced with heavy exertion at the crank handle, he was in quite a state. Sweating profusely and saying things no god-fearing soul should ever have to utter, he was starting to upset the whole family.

Finally, he snapped, and calling upon the powers of thunder and lightning, he said, “Die, devil, die!” In his rage he struck the car with the crank handle - which careened off the hood and shattered one of the headlamps.

Apparently that was the cue the family dog had been waiting for, and it started to attack the car ferociously. In shocked disbelief the family was still looking at the broken headlight when the dog got its angle of attack just right, and popped the rear tire.

I believe they missed the funeral.

As the story goes, it was not too long afterwards that the old geezer blew his fuse for the last time and made good on his promise. After he had the family get out of the car, he set it alight - in full view of everyone.

Source: Doreen Koorts

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